|
Monday, 14 April 2008 13:48 God..please..i am tired..let me find my rest in you Lord..i am really stressed out..i thank you for the ppl you sent to me..ok..not my ears but cui xian jie..i believe i really made her very angry yesterday..i am really sorry..i won't avoid you de..you are just too good to me..haiz..you scolded me for a reason..so no need for a sorry..i am sorry to everyone around me..i dunno why but i am very irritated with the slightest things that happened around me recently..i had no one to talk to...all my ears seems troubled..i dun wish to find anymore new ears..so just wish to say sorry to those who wants to help me..did not want to go church today de..was really God's plan that i arrived at church today..i really had no mood..a church friend asked me what i take church for..haiz..i mean maybe you dun understand what i am going through now?how am i going to stand again when everything around me seems to be wrong...my 3 tracks are all not doing well-family.school,church..nothing seems to be perfect..everything/everyone seems to be going against me..i think maybe this is how God is building me but i am really tired..tired of life?maybe..people are struggling to live yet i am thinking of dying..haiz..living is really a big obstacle that eveyone has to face..maybe i dun have that courage to overcome these obstacles..is letting it go a good idea? reached church at abt 11.30 today..was really late but it's better than nothing..attended worship gathering but my heart was absent..could not focus..after that actually wanted to go to the john little sales but ya..did not manage to go..when was wondering where to go..the church friend i mentioned earlier asked me why i did not attend service,and cell..told him i woke up late..he askwd me whose fault izzit..it's my fault..i will try to wake up earlier..then actually planned to go ziting's hse to play cluedo with her because that time she suddenly sms me telling me she wants to play cluedo..but then did not go her place..went to tm with michelle..talked to her?ya..little lah..then after that went to bedok library to sleep..happy seems to be deleted from my dictionary/my life..haiz..hope that my new week will be a better one.. |
